Hurting
I feel like crying so bad right now. Theres a huge lump in my throat....Theo and Jennifer, and maybe even Colin, but I dont know, think Im pushing it too much with religion...I thought the point of being a christian was to talk to others about our faith...I only talked to Theo about it like..two times and I gave him a poem I wrote for Colin that kinda reminded me of him.
Outspoken Truth
Dazed and confused
Looking for a part-time God
For their own private use
Too scared
To put on a public display
To show their affection
For the God to which they pray
Dazed and confused
Religion is not only skin deep
Not for personal use
God is not some secret that your supposed to keep
You are not alone
When things go bad, He will come through
The important thing to remember
Is that God is watching over you
You dont have to be dazed and confused
Looking for some God for your own personal use
Only praying when things go wrong
Worshipping Him when you dont belong
Trying to deny the faith you feel
Always trying to make some deal
Never willing to go all the way
Never will you for the God to which you pray
You dont seem to see that religion is not only skin deep
And that God is not some secret that your supposed to keep.

And Colin liked it..and Theo said he didnt get it. And then, I later find that Theo and Jennifer have been talking to Crystal about me...why didnt they just come to me?! I know how I react when they do..I just apologize alot and stop talking about it..for a few weeks...or whatever. But they didnt even try talking to me! AND jennifer talks to me about it too! Im just really upset. Theo says he doesnt want to hurt my feelings by telling me to stop talking about it, but he hurt my feelings by not telling me..it just shows me how much he doesnt know me...were such good friends now, but..we havent gotten to know eachother.....I dont know what to do!
::tear runs down cheek::
I wonder if Eman feels the same way?
((I think I was best off when I stayed away from people and stuck with myself))
Also, Theo was kinda' mad because I dont like Colin but I talk to him...I do because Colins being cool now, and he talks to me...Im not the kinda' person to brush someone off if they come to me...like, its hard to explain..but I know Colin is into some trouble and he wants to change...so why would I turn my back on him if he needs help?
Ah, and Sarah informs me now she thinks I talk about religion too much also........
IM NOT TALKING ANYMORE! ::tear::