Rest for the weary

So we spent the night at the Judes last night - good times. I got more sleep than Ive gotten in the past 6 weeks and I was able to enjoy the company of the lovely Judses and young Ethan, whom by the way is completely hilarious. Just ask him to howl like a wolf/coyote. ^_^ So, that was good.

But something crazy has been going on lately... everyone has been dying; why? Three people died in their sleep (including my Dad) and the weirdest part to me is that its happening as spring rolls in. To me, I always imagined deaths occuring mid-winter or late winter - not end of winter early spring... But just the way it's like every week someone else dies, it really makes you think of your life and what you value. Tonight Jason talked about the day that Christians face judgement and receive different rewards, and like how Jesus could potentially say to us, "Well done good and faithful servant" and stuff like that. With how depressing the past couple months have been, that was a really encouraging thing to talk about because it actually made me feel like I have a reason to leave as opposed to facing the constant struggle to want to get out of bed or do my homework or even care about anything.

Mostly, Im just concerned about getting my life back straight with God before I allow the enemy to take advantage of my depression and make things a lot worse and also about who could die next and what I should do in response to the next death. How much closer can losing someone get? Tobi was the first close death that I have to deal with and that was like Job (not exactly but Tobi was VERY close to me) and I chose to say, "Okay God, I know Tobi died and my Dad is sick and thats hard but I still believe in you and can praise You.." Then Grandpa Gene died and that wasnt too hard to deal with but still kinda a wake up call. Then dad died and now Im starting to get to the point in Jobs life where I dont want to care anymore. The love for God is still there but the action is not behind the passion. I want to want to want to do things for Christ. (read that a few times, maybe you'll get it. lol) Anyway, I have announcements to prepare for for church tomorrow.